You Felt So Dumb…

Let’s be real, it didn’t just happen one time.

In fact, it happened several times, and each time you hoped and even prayed the next time would be different.

You hoped that he’d actually propose after so many years together.

You hoped you’d be the only woman in his life after he said I love you.

But that’s not what happened. Instead, you walked away feeling insecure, confused and dazed.

You asked for a commitment, and he said you were too demanding.

You asked him to set a date, and he said you didn’t know how to let things flow naturally.

You asked “why,” and he said you nag too much.

You did the things that your heart deserved yet, you walked away scarred and bruised, and wondering if you were the problem.

“Maybe it is me,” you thought to yourself.

You needed some perspective on the situation so you talked to a few friends. You asked for their input and they confirmed, “girl, that guy was just a jerk.”

“He was sweet at first and he was really into me,” you explained.

“He always talked about the future. He talked about a future with someone like me,” you were so thrown off by the way things ended.

You truly didn’t see it coming and now you feel silly, crazy and naïve.

In the days and weeks to come, Jesus, quiet time and prayer become your confidants. As you pray, God begins to speak to you until your epiphany arrives.

“It wasn’t me who had the problem,” you say to yourself.   “It wasn’t me at all.”

It wasn’t you who wanted too much, and it wasn’t you who wasn’t enough.

God’s love begins to help you realize that you were the exact woman He created you to be, from head to toe.

  • Fearfully and wonderfully made;
  • made in His image;
  • daughter of royalty;
  • far above rubies.

Your standards weren’t too high.  Your expectations weren’t unreasonable.  Your requests were not inconceivable.

Your desires and requests were reflective of the love you knew you deserved. They represented the man your mother and father would want you to court and marry.

Can any ladies relate to this situation?

We often date men whose spiritual immaturity causes us to doubt and question the frame of our being.   I know this because once upon a time, I settled and dated men who spiritually, were light years behind me.  As a result, I found myself in the midst of painful heartbreaks and tissue balls of tears.

If you’re single, now is the time to think about the kind of relationship, marriage and husband you desire to have. Moreover, now is the time to begin becoming the wife you desire to be.

The thing about breakups is that though we may resiliently bounce back from the pain of the breakup, we still walk away with scars that often never heal. We break-up—> wait a few months  —> meet someone else—> and relive the cycle all over again. The afflicted areas of our hearts become numb, and we never take the time to be raw because we’re too impatient to wait for the right love and the right one.

No wonder we never heal.  No wonder we struggle to identify real love.

I believe God wants to deliver us from the pain of our past and gift us with beauty for ashes, as is promised in His word (Isaiah 61:3).   I believe He wants us to experience a greater love, and I believe that level of love is possible when we simply believe and place our plans in His hands.

That one guy may have made you feel dumb in the past but that does not have to be your future.   Your love story can be rewritten and those nightmares of broken relationships can end today.

As we seek God, we obtain discernment and we acquire the wisdom to make better dating decisions.

As we tend to our hearts, we discover our identity in Christ and we avoid falling prey to men who do not have our best interests at heart. Regardless of your past, my prayer is that it will be a learning experience and not a permanent scar.

Acknowledge those experiences for what they were and move on…except, this time with God.

Love,

~ETE

Prayer:

Dear Father, I pray for the heart of every woman that reads this prayer. I pray over her heart and ask for you to bless her mind. For every heartbreak and moment of pain in her past, I ask that you bless her with ten times the anointing and healing. Restore her heart. Renew her mind. Reaffirm her identity in you. Redeem her lost time. Remind her of just precious she is to you. Today, I decree and declare that the pain and heartbreak of her past will be no more.  I speak grace and favor over her life, and I ask for you to rewrite her love story.  In the name of Jesus, Amen.

5 Comments
  • JENNIFER SCOTT
    May 26, 2016

    Amen!

  • Courtney White
    May 26, 2016

    Amen! What a wonderful reminder to see ourselves as God sees us and for declaring a new season over the life of every woman who reads this!

  • Roselyn
    May 26, 2016

    How merciful and loving is our God whom through HIS unfailing love, rescues us and allows us to take refuge in HIM. In Christ the word late or delay doesn’t have a place when we put our hope and trust in HIM. He is always ready and able to restore. As Courtney beautifully stated you have really reminded us of our identity in HIM, and God’s amazing love for us, with your bold declaration and prayer. May God send you timely reminders of His LOVE as you faithfully do unto us.

  • Roselyn
    May 26, 2016

    How merciful and loving is our God whom through HIS unfailing love, rescues us and allows us to take refuge in HIM. In Christ the word late or delay doesn’t have a place when we put our hope and trust in HIM. He is always ready and able to restore. As Courtney beautifully stated you have really reminded us of our identity in HIM, and God’s amazing love for us with your bold declaration and prayer. May God send you timely reminders of His LOVE as you faithfully do unto us.

  • Daphne
    June 4, 2016

    Want to cry because this is exactly what I needed to read. Thank you boss lady!

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