An Open Letter From 1 Single to A Few Marrieds & A Couple of Singles…
- “Girl, your husband is not going to find you if you’re wearing pantyhose…you need to show some leg.”
- “You need to get out and do more”
- “You need to go places where a guy can find you”
- “Don’t you think it’s time that you started looking for and praying for a husband?”
- “Why aren’t you dating anyone?”
- “When do you want to get married?”
- “What kind of man do you like?”
These are some of the comments and questions that I’ve received over the past month regarding dating and marriage. Interesting, right?!? The first one is my favorite because it’s one of those that makes you stop and go “did that really just happen?” Ummmm…yeah, it did.
I truly don’t think that people said these things from a bad place but I do believe they came from a place of fear. Specifically, a fear of time—people look at what’s happening externally and try to find a match internally (spiritually, biologically and emotional). However, what people (including myself) forget to remember is that God is the author of time therefore, there’s no need for us to rush the process. God created time therefore He alone knows when the time is right for dating, engagement, and marriage. Our worrying and planning can never change that.
Contrary to popular belief SINGLENESS is not a disease or an illness that you catch. It’s a process that takes time in order to develop, prepare and refine you. Once the process is complete, you will be complete too.
A few days ago someone asked what seemed to be a million questions about dating and marriage. When the examination was over so was my patience lol…well almost. I woke up the next day and that laundry list of questions was still running through my mind so I decided to write the following and it went a little like this:
Dear Married Couples, Lonely Singles & Nosey Singles:
Yes, we’re single but NO we don’t want to hear your comments all of the time. I can’t speak for other singles but I can say the following for myself:
If you’re truly that concerned about my love life, the best thing you can do is send a prayer up to God. Pray that God will send the right man at the right time. Pray for my discernment and wisdom. Pray for peace, love and happiness in my future marriage. Pray for the things you wished you had prayed for before you got married.
If you’re one of the Lonely & Nosey Singles: Get a hobby, find your purpose and discover your calling. If you’re lonely and nosey, you are the LAST person in the world that I’m listening to.
Contrary to popular belief, there are some singles that are having a ball living their dream and walking in their purpose. Though we may desire to be married one day, we also understand that great things simply take time…
A Happy Single