Rejection-Get Immune To It!

Rejection-Get Immune To It!

 There are two definitions for the word rejection.

  1. The action of rejecting; the state of being rejected
  2. An immune response in which foreign tissue (as of a skin graft or transplanted organ) is attacked by immune system components of the recipient organism.

The second definition is my favorite because it’s a game-changer for self-esteem and the way we process rejection.

Generally we view rejection as its synonyms: denial, repudiation and negation.  But the second definition lets us know that there’s another side to rejection.

The first definition of rejection internalizes rejection and allows the feeling of rejection to control its response.  The first definition responds with things that say I’m being rejected because:

 “I’m not good enough”

“I’m not handsome or pretty enough”

“My body isn’t as good as his or her body”

“My hair isn’t long enough”

“My skin isn’t clear enough”

“My family isn’t as prestigious as his or hers”

“I’m not cool enough because I don’t have any connection and I don’t know anyone”

“I’m just not enough”

The first definition takes rejection as a personal attack.  It allows someone else’s thoughts to dictate their own thoughts about themselves.  But then there’s the second definition, the game-changer.  The game-changer remains cool, calm, collected and confident.  When experiencing rejection it responds with thoughts such as:

“Oh you didn’t choose me…cool, God didn’t choose you for me either.”

“I’m not a good fit for your company, no problem.  I don’t believe you’re the right fit for my vision.  My vision is large and God only allows the right people to fit into that vision.”

“Oh so you don’t want to be my friend anymore?  Thank you for your honesty.  I am free of one less burden.”

“Oh, so you think there’s someone better out there for you?  You’re right, the best is yet to come for me too! So thanks for the reminder.”

The second definition remains empowered.  It does not internalize others’ thoughts and feelings about him or her.  It stays in a place of confidence by knowing that no one and nothing can ever take anything away from him or her.  No one can ever say or do anything to make him or her feel less than who he or she is.  Furthermore, no thought, place, person or thing can change his or her value.

 The second definition rejects the rejection the moment it occurs.

A few days ago, I read the rejection letter that the music band U2 received.


The words that stood out were “not suitable for us.”

U2 didn’t fit what RSO Records Limited was looking for but one day, they were the perfect match for another record label.  They had the perfect the sound and appearance for another label.

However, imagine if U2 allowed that one moment of not being a fit for RSO to affect their dreams.   Imagine if they let one moment of rejection affect the rest of their future.  If so, we would have no great songs to sing and dance to.  Thousands of people would be void of their worldwide influence, and I would have no inspiration to write this post to you today.

There are always two sides to rejection.  When someone rejects you, never take it personal.  Remain in a position of peace and empowerment.  Understand that the door God has opened for you is one of exclusivity.  Everyone isn’t meant to be granted access through your door.  Everyone isn’t meant to walk the red carpet with you.

Thank God for the rejection and keep going.

Scripture: Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)




  • Courtney W.
    March 11, 2014

    This was a wonderful post. You are so wise my friend and I agree completely with your post. It met me right when I needed to reflect more deeply on the topic. I think we have to see rejection from a broader sense.

    1. If the person was not where we were spiritually, we weren’t rejected- the relationship was unequally yoked. 2 Corinthians 6:14 is clear on us not being unequally yoked with unbelievers Also, Amos 3:3 “Can two walk together unless they have agreed” We can’t be in relationships where there is no agreement and if we were never in agreement with them, they can’t reject us.

    2. If God has bigger plans for us outside of the relationship we weren’t rejected- we were promoted. Jeremiah 29:11 says I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.

    3. If God wants to bring us back together with the person at a later point we weren’t rejected- we were redirected. Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has made all things beautiful in HIS time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

    God knows what vision he has for us and as it says in Habakkuk, that vision is for an appointed time. We will ony experience rejection where we fail to seek God and his plan for our life. He has HIS best for us and as we seek him we will walk in the fullness he has prepared for us.

    Thank you again friend for a beautiful message. I love you.

    • ErikaTheEncourager
      March 11, 2014

      I love the three points you’ve made so much! I especially love the scripture that you shared from Ecclesiastes. But of each thing, I love this statement most because it speaks volumes about the importance of being equally yoked. “We can’t be in relationships where there is no agreement and if we were never in agreement with them, they can’t reject us.” Thanks so much for your wisdom. These are such great points for us to retain and remember as we move forward in our walk with God and in life. No matter what, we are always favored to receive God’s best. I love you too friend! Very much =)

    • Roselyn
      March 11, 2014

      It is such a blessing to read your comments on ETE. You both write from such a sincere place, it makes the message so worthy to read and also gain clear understanding of who God is and how he works in our lives. Your points are so well defined and backed with great scripture to assure us of how God works through rejection.Thank you!

      • ErikaTheEncourager
        March 11, 2014

        That means so much to me. I’m thankful to have faithful friends that read what I write. This blog has been such a blessing to my relationship with Christ. I grow so much from reading others’ comments and just the process of writing alone. It’s such a blessing to be able to grow and learn together. God is truly doing a great in our lives and I know that 2014 is a year that will transform our lives in new ways. I believe our understanding will reach new heights and our wisdom will grow deeper. In the name of Jesus, Amen. So thanks to you too!

    • Christine
      March 19, 2014

      Yes, this reminds me of Romans 8:31.. if God is for us, who then can be against us… It is so true.. there is no way we can be rejected if God in his infinite wisdom for our lives already has the vision in place. The best thing for us to do is surrender to His will and allow Him to direct our paths. We as Children of the King should never force anyone to see what God has already said about us. It is not our job to do that.

      • ErikaTheEncourager
        March 19, 2014

        Amen! One of my friends sums up Romans 8:31 so well. She always says “God + Me = A Majority” I absolutely love that because it gives me a great visual of the power of having Jesus on our side.

  • Roselyn
    March 11, 2014

    Your post today is mind blowing. It’s one that many can relate to because somewhere along the line we have faced rejection in some way or sort. We need to remember that man will or may face many rejections In life; even Jesus Christ did. One minute man was praising and saying hosanna hosanna and the next minute it was crucify him crucify him. Through it all he still died for our sins and gives us assurance in Psalm 27:”Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close”. He also states in Luke 10:16 “The one who hears you hears me, and the one who rejects you rejects me, and the one who rejects me rejects him who sent me.” When we encounter or feel rejection, as you have given us the understanding today we need to adopt the” game-changer” theory love it by the way so perfectly laid out by you today and not see it as someone’s loss. This was also from your post last year. We need too realize and believe that it’s a way for God to redirect our path to show his greatness and not a loss but an opportunity for God to intervene in our lives!!!
    May God continue to bless you, enlarge your ministry and life. You are so gifted and allow your gift to reach others in such a selfless way it is so inspiring!


    • ErikaTheEncourager
      March 11, 2014

      Amen Rozzy! And your scripture from Luke 10:16 breaks this down so well and really makes it hit close to home for each of us. I’m so thankful for coming across this rejection letter by U2. It truly transformed rejection for me. I will never allow another experience of rejection to make me feel rejected when God’s word clearly says that I am accepted and approved, and declares that his plans for my life are for good and not harm. I reject every thought and urge to internalize man’s rejection when God’s word and plan surpasses all. Thanks so much for sharing your wisdom. I feel empowered today! And I hope you do too. I love you!

  • Christine
    March 19, 2014

    This post was definitely needed for me. I was operating on the first definition instead of letting the second one be my truth. We often hear the saying “rejection is God’s protection” but we often only see that in hindsight, not when we are actually in the midst of the rejection. Our fleshy emotions begin to allow Satan to lie to us to make us believe we are not enough. This post helped to immediately change what I was feeling emotionally and start to use the weapon (God’s word) to remind me what God said about me (Jeremiah 29:11, Romans 8:28, Romans 8:31, Ephesians 2:10). Thank you so much. God bless.

    • ErikaTheEncourager
      March 19, 2014

      Hey Sis! It was a great reminder for me too! God truly enlightened the eyes of my understanding on the proper way to view rejection.

Drop me a line!


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