Rejection-Get Immune To It!
There are two definitions for the word rejection.
- The action of rejecting; the state of being rejected
- An immune response in which foreign tissue (as of a skin graft or transplanted organ) is attacked by immune system components of the recipient organism.
The second definition is my favorite because it’s a game-changer for self-esteem and the way we process rejection.
Generally we view rejection as its synonyms: denial, repudiation and negation. But the second definition lets us know that there’s another side to rejection.
The first definition of rejection internalizes rejection and allows the feeling of rejection to control its response. The first definition responds with things that say I’m being rejected because:
“I’m not good enough”
“I’m not handsome or pretty enough”
“My body isn’t as good as his or her body”
“My hair isn’t long enough”
“My skin isn’t clear enough”
“My family isn’t as prestigious as his or hers”
“I’m not cool enough because I don’t have any connection and I don’t know anyone”
“I’m just not enough”
The first definition takes rejection as a personal attack. It allows someone else’s thoughts to dictate their own thoughts about themselves. But then there’s the second definition, the game-changer. The game-changer remains cool, calm, collected and confident. When experiencing rejection it responds with thoughts such as:
“Oh you didn’t choose me…cool, God didn’t choose you for me either.”
“I’m not a good fit for your company, no problem. I don’t believe you’re the right fit for my vision. My vision is large and God only allows the right people to fit into that vision.”
“Oh so you don’t want to be my friend anymore? Thank you for your honesty. I am free of one less burden.”
“Oh, so you think there’s someone better out there for you? You’re right, the best is yet to come for me too! So thanks for the reminder.”
The second definition remains empowered. It does not internalize others’ thoughts and feelings about him or her. It stays in a place of confidence by knowing that no one and nothing can ever take anything away from him or her. No one can ever say or do anything to make him or her feel less than who he or she is. Furthermore, no thought, place, person or thing can change his or her value.
The second definition rejects the rejection the moment it occurs.
A few days ago, I read the rejection letter that the music band U2 received.
The words that stood out were “not suitable for us.”
U2 didn’t fit what RSO Records Limited was looking for but one day, they were the perfect match for another record label. They had the perfect the sound and appearance for another label.
However, imagine if U2 allowed that one moment of not being a fit for RSO to affect their dreams. Imagine if they let one moment of rejection affect the rest of their future. If so, we would have no great songs to sing and dance to. Thousands of people would be void of their worldwide influence, and I would have no inspiration to write this post to you today.
There are always two sides to rejection. When someone rejects you, never take it personal. Remain in a position of peace and empowerment. Understand that the door God has opened for you is one of exclusivity. Everyone isn’t meant to be granted access through your door. Everyone isn’t meant to walk the red carpet with you.
Thank God for the rejection and keep going.
Scripture: Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)