Proverbs 19:2 says “enthusiasm without knowledge is no good; haste makes mistakes.” This verse had the greatest impact in the area of my relationships this year. For me, this scripture says “don’t rush into relationships. Take your time and wait on God.”
When dating, (especially in Christian dating) it’s so easy to daydream about the possibilities when we meet someone who appears to have similar Christian values and morals. We think to ourselves “OMG, this guy/girl is perfect! They are beautiful, God-fearing, kind-hearted and they attend church. I think this might be the one” lol! In times like this when excitement is high and everything seems perfect, God beckons our heart and spirit to slow down.
God desires that nothing and no one remove our peace. Therefore, He encourages us to take our time and be intentional about maintaining His presence in our dating relationships. Philippians 4:6-7 says “be anxious for nothing but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” God knows that anxiety can cause us to overlook important details about a person/relationship and therefore, He encourages us to take things slow. Hindsight may be 20/20, but God’s insight is priceless.
The Importance of Listening
Often times we do a make a conscious effort to pray for God’s wisdom and guidance regarding a person but we don’t always give ourselves an opportunity to hear from God. We are so busy telling God what we desire, and so busy praying about what we want, that we forget to make time to listen. In the haste of our busyness we neglect the need to listen and our haste leads to mistakes (Prov. 19:2).
The only way to receive instruction is to listen for it. We have to allow ourselves to be quieted so that we can hear where God wants to take us and what He wants us to do. If you ask a friend for directions, you wouldn’t talk over him/her while guiding you. Similarly, it is not wise for us to continue moving forward in a relationship while praying for God’s guidance. Instead, we must take a step back, and be patient in our prayer life until God reveals the next step for the relationship. We must give God an opportunity to respond to our prayer request(s) and be still until He does so.
Though it often feels inconvenient to wait for God’s response, His request to wait is only for our protection. As a single, God does not want you to be harmed or hurt. He wants your heart to be whole so that you can love and care for your spouse when the time is right. Therefore, the best way to maintain a heart that is whole is to have an attitude of patience that does not move in haste.
Waiting Provides Revelation
Waiting is beneficial because it gives God an opportunity to work on qualities in the person you are dating, as well as qualities within you. How many times have you dated someone and thought “man, I had no idea this person was so selfish, inconsistent, insecure, etc…”? While you may not have known, God knew and because of that, He wanted you to give the relationship a bit more time to grow so that He could grow inside of the other person. Another benefit of waiting is that it gives God an opportunity to reveal things about a person’s character. Enthusiasm and excitement often cause us to overlook harmful character traits but patience reveals them. When you wait for God’s instruction, His wisdom will identify those areas for you and He will provide you with instruction on how to handle them.
Our happiness and joy mean more to God than we’ll ever know but His desire for our wisdom exceeds those things, because following His wisdom will always bring us joy (Prov. 4:7). Patience and peace have been two of the biggest and most impactful lessons in my life this year. I never imagined that I would receive so much peace and joy from waiting but I did, and I am so thankful for the blessing. In reading today’s post, it is my hope that you too will learn to wait and learn to be content with waiting.
When we are intentional about keeping God at the center of everything in our lives, we receive the blessing of God’s wisdom and instruction. An old saying, says that “silence is golden.” So as I close, my saying is “if you want a life that’s golden, learn to be patient by waiting on God.”
Allow God to be your guide in your dating relationships, and allow Him to order your steps before going deeper in your relationships. When you do this, God promises to honor your patience and He promises to give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4).
Happy Friday! =)