Still Standing

6 , Permalink 0

When I woke up this morning the words “Still Standing” were on my mind.  I don’t know why but they just were. At the end of 2012, I began dating someone who I thought was my “dream guy.”  Everything about him seemed to be more than I could’ve ever imagined and I was excited about our future together.  Throughout the course of our relationship, he encouraged me to begin participating in a weekly Prayer Call.  He knew how much I valued my relationship with God and thought the Prayer Calls would be a great addition to my faith.  I decided to try the Call one day and after a few weeks, I was hooked! They were so encouraging and they provided that extra boost to be triumphant throughout the work week.

Time went on and things between the guy and I eventually veered off path.  The relationship was in shambles and I no longer knew the person I had fallen for.  The joy of the relationship was gone and things eventually ended.  When the relationship came to a close, it was quite a shock because he left without a goodbye or an explanation.  I thought to myself “is this really happening to me right now?”  I wondered how the person I loved could do such a hurtful thing.  I was hurt and confused.  A week had passed since our final conversation.  It was Tuesday morning and it was time to dial-in for the Prayer Call, only this time I couldn’t do it.  Every time I thought about that Call, I thought about him too and it was just too much to endure emotionally. I needed time to process what I was experiencing and I needed time to heal.  In order to accomplish these things, I decided to take a break from the Prayer Call and wait until I had peace and healing.

Three months had passed since the relationship ended, and I had finally regained the strength that I seemed to have lost.  I could finally handle hearing someone ask about him without shedding a tear.  I could finally accept that things ended the way God needed them to end.  I reminded myself that regardless of what happened, no breakup could interrupt the plans that God has for my life (Jer. 29:11; Rev. 3:7-8). I was strong and my confidence was bouncing back day-by-day.

When I went to bed last night, I set my alarm for 5AM so that I could go to the gym this morning. However, if it went off I don’t recall hearing it because I woke up to a different alarm at 6:58AM–the Prayer Call alarm.  That alarm hadn’t gone off in months. I thought to myself  “how did that happen?”  As I fought to ease out of my groggy slumber, something inside prompted me to dial-in.  I barely remembered the number so I logged onto the Pastor’s Twitter account to retrieve the number.  I hurriedly scrolled down my feed and read “last call of the year taking place today. This is one you don’t want to miss.”  The memories of the breakup began to come to mind and I wondered if this was something I should do. “Uggghhh…do I really want to do this?”  I continued to feel that small nudge in my spirit, so I picked up the phone and dialed-in.  I figured “I may be scared but I don’t want to miss whatever this nudge is.”

When I joined the call the Pastor’s first words were “I want to talk to you today about CLOSURE.  Wow, did he really just say that? I felt my face grow warm as my tear ducts prepared to cry.  God knew exactly what my heart needed to hear.  I had been delayed purposely so that I could receive my closure.  As the pastor continued to speak, he reminded the callers that despite the trials of 2013, we made it. He reminded us that God carried us and the words “STILL STANDING” came to mind.

Suddenly, I realized that nothing that took place in 2013 was a surprise to God. He knew what was going to happen and when it was going to happen, and because of His great, deep love for me…He equipped me to handle it. He equipped me with the strength to stand when others tried to pull me down.  He supplied me with the grace not to be carried away in the storm’s wind.  As I reflected on the year, I realized that though the events of 2013 were often a surprise to me, His great grace allowed me to look back at everything and say “STILL STANDING.”

When the call ended, I was so thankful.  I did not think twice about missing my morning workout. The only thing that mattered in that moment, was the way God turned every bad thing around and caused those things to work out (Romans 8:28).

Today, I am thankful that I can say…I am still standing.

 

Photo Credit: Benson Kua Photo Name: "A Little Trim" Retrieved From: "Backgrounds" application for Android.

Photo Credit: Benson Kua
Photo Name: “A Little Trim”
Retrieved From: “Backgrounds” application for Android.

“Blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water.” (Jeremiah 17:7-8)

Be blessed & Happy Tuesday! You are STILL STANDING! =)

6 Comments
  • Courtney W.
    December 17, 2013

    Erika,

    Thank you for sharing your story. Your testimony is so amazing. I understand the pain that you felt from the end of a relationship and I also know that in time God will make all things new and as the testimony has shown thus far, He already has begun the process! Your experience will make you better and has already brought you closer to our savior. It was an experience that may have been painful but will purge you and bring you to a place of restoration in Christ. I am so thankful for you sharing your story. It reminds people that in time things will be ok. In time our heart will be put back together. In time we can try again. In time we move #forward

    • ErikaTheEncourager
      December 18, 2013

      Thanks for being by my side throughout that experience, and even now. Your prayers and words of encouragement truly helped me on the days and nights that were so dark inside. Everything you’ve said is so true so I receive it. I look forward to moving forward. Thank you so much for always reminding me to keep moving forward. It helps to keep me strong in God and focused on Him instead of myself. I am excited to see where God moves both of us next year. =)

  • Roselyn
    December 17, 2013

    Today’s message is so refreshing. I can relate so well, likewise many who have been and are in confusing relationships, where you see the other person change and their promises changing without warning. Interestingly enough I was personally going through a tough situation with my relationship; seeing the one I thought was perfect for me, making promises I thought would last forever change his ways has been quite a journey. This was very disturbing and I felt I had no one to turn to, making me feel broken and almost unable to mend myself back together. After adding you on Facebook, I read one of your daily encouraging messages in which you talked about overcoming life by not asking God why, rather asking God to see us through our situations. That post really resonated in my heart and gave me a different perspective on approaching what I was going through emotionally. It has been a blessing and great encouragement reading your post. I wake up looking forward to reading what Erika will post so I can find positivity out of difficult situations. As I continue to figure out what direction God has for me and what part this person plays or will play in my life, reading your blog helps me deal with the hurt towards this person and attain peace within. The troubled relationship has actually helped me establish a stronger relationship with God, not seeking for him to fix the relationship but finding my own purpose with the help of your blog. The hurt in relationships teaches us that indeed the true promises in life are the promises made by God and not by humans. God is the only one who we can rely on for joy and happiness. Matthew 11:28-29″Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls”.

    • ErikaTheEncourager
      December 18, 2013

      Awww Roz, you had me in tears when I read this last night. I remember that post and I remember writing it right in the midst of everything. That was a rough time but a few days before that, Pastor Joel shared the scripture in Matthew where God promises to tread through the deep waters of life with us. After hearing that sermon and reading the scripture, I was encouraged and strengthened to move forward. It’s amazing how much we’re able to help one another grow in life & in Christ by sharing our stories. Today, you’ve encouraged me to keep sharing and continue moving forward. I will be praying that God continues to heal your heart and renew it. You are such a jewel and a gift to others. Your wisdom is a blessing and it always plants new seeds of life whenever you share it. My favorite part of your post is “the true promises in life are the promises made by God.” This is such a great reminder as we build new friendships and relationships. At some point in time, we will fail one another but because of God’s great love for us, He will never fail us and His love will always remain constant. Love you! 🙂

  • Taya
    December 18, 2013

    Yes, STILL STANDING!!! Thank you for being so transparent, bold, and courageous. Since 2009, it has been a constant emotional rollercoaster. I would say 2011, I finally started to see a speck of light. I now see the victory and strength that I have gained; which could only occur through the hurdles and situations I have endured. I read this post and immediately tears began to fall. I lost my Grandfather in August and took a leap of faith and moved to DC in Sept. It has definitely been a struggle but I am glad I didn’t and wont allow fear to paralyze me. Each day is a struggle, and I find myself often trying to refrain from crying, but I know God continues to clear paths and sustain me. I believe God is reminding me through your post to keep holding on and trust him. I will continue to stand! God Bless!

    • ErikaTheEncourager
      December 19, 2013

      There’s so much strength gained by standing. Sometimes we get so focused on just making it through the day, that we forget that God is sustaining us and renewing our strength even in the midst of our biggest challenge(s). Yesterday, I read an article that said “we see today. God sees tomorrow.” That quote truly sums up our vision during the midst of life’s challenges. It’s like you said “I now see the victory and strength that I have gained.” You didn’t see those things at the time but God did. He knew you could handle it. He knew you’d still be standing at the end of everything. He knew that He was enough to sustain you and supply all of your needs but it required faith and patience to learn those things. Though it hurt, you became stronger, wiser and better-prepared for the next victory. I’m so proud of you for sharing your story in your comment because now someone else can read it and be encouraged. Now, someone else can gain strength because you held onto God and took a leap of faith to uproot yourself and follow God. You’re light Taya. Never forget that and never stop standing tall and allowing your light to shine. You’ve encouraged & inspired me today!

Drop me a line!

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox

Join other followers:

%d bloggers like this: